We have been in an abusive relationship for the last eight years, ladies and gentlemen. We have been dating this horrible person who believes that very few people are actually good and even fewer deserve to be happy. He was involved in a massive pedophile ring too. We didn’t like it, but we also didn’t do much about it. Our significant other treated us terribly and when he left, we were just hoping that the next one would be better.
And he was. This one smiles at us more, he buys us flowers from a little shop down the street from his house, he believes in helping the poor and he has compassion for people. After the last one, Ted Bundy might have seemed like a good mate, but this one is actually really sweet. It’s too bad that he’s the same old abusive boyfriend just in a new outfit.
Know what I’m talking about? The Motherfucking Pope. Everyone in the world, Catholics, non-Catholics, even secularists, went gaga over this guy because he says nice things about people and appears more humble than the last motherfucker. We’ve all seem to forgotten one tiny thing; he is the Motherfucking Pope and head of a church that systematically abused thousands of children for decades, he’s head of a theology that believes women are secondary and the entire LGBT community is not worthy of leading a full and complete life. He believes that a man named Jesus walked the earth and turned wine and wafers into his blood and body and he mimics that action, believing that the communion he serves is actually the body and blood of his savior.
Why are we worshiping him like he’s a person that we should look up to? The fact of the matter is that the inequality the church promotes is never going to go away. Women will never be priests, or be regarded as anything other than baby machines for men to use to have sons. A gay man will never be accepted as a Catholic unless he renounces his sexuality and practices abstinence. Marriage equality is a joke for Catholics. And he’s still promoting the same lies and superstitions about religion that have been around for centuries. All of the “progress” that Motherfucking Pope Francis is allegedly making is just talk.
He says things that sound nice and people fawn over him like he’s the first person to realize that the poor need to be taken care or that atheists can be good people (who are still going to hell). We’re in 2013 here; we already know this. Him saying it doesn’t change a goddamn thing.
But nevertheless, whenever Motherfucking Pope Francis does something nice for someone he’s hailed as not only a wonderful person, but a wonderful example of a Catholic. He’s doing exactly what the church wants him to. He’s distancing them and himself from all of the bad press that the Catholic church has had and is forming the idea that Catholics are just really nice people who want everyone to love each other.
I, for one, am not falling for it. I was born and raised Catholic and most of my family is still Catholic. I know what it’s like to live with the concept of Catholic Guilt. To be ashamed of my body and my sexuality (and I’m straight. I can’t imagine how I would feel if I was gay). I know what it’s like to be told that women are nice, but they make babies, and that’s what Jesus wants them to do with their lives. I’ve heard people defending pedophile priests and accusing the children they abused for acting inappropriately around them and causing their molestation.
Never forget what the Catholic Church has done and what they still believe. The Motherfucking Pope is not your friend. Just because he does superficially nice things doesn’t mean that he’s a good person or that his mixed up, outdated, abusive religion is correct. Don’t fawn over this Motherfucking Pope and don’t allow him to blind you to the real horrors that the Catholic church has committed and continues to commit.